


Poison Never Tasted So Good

by Pieceofship



Series: Monster Factory [4]
Category: Danganronpa, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: F/M, Fantasy, Monster - Freeform, Monster!AU, Monster!Miu, Spiders, fantasy!au, spider - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-18 07:46:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18116411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pieceofship/pseuds/Pieceofship
Summary: During an adventure, Gonta stumbles across a giant foul-mouthed, eight-legged woman named Miu.





	Poison Never Tasted So Good

Gonta could hardly contain himself when he was selected for an expedition. The promise of coin and treasure would undoubtedly make his life easier and hopefully gain him his parent’s approval. Not only did Rantaro think his strength would be useful, but his research in entomology. They would be travelling in the wilderness, after all, knowledge of poisonous insects and antidotes would be extremely useful. And this was Rantaro, one of the most well-known adventurers out there! He could have chosen anyone to accompany him and he chose Gonta! 

Well, not only him. But also a talented mage called Himiko and an assassin from a much-respected guild named Maki. They all had little in common, but this job gave them a common goal to work towards. And after many days and many nights travelling on foot, they were so close to the location that promised treasure. 

“You really shouldn’t enable her,” Maki spoke, narrowing her eyes at Himiko, who was currently being given a piggyback ride by Gonta after claiming her mana was low.

“But, Himiko said mana was low.” Gonta pointed out. 

“From doing what? She hasn’t cast any spells today.” Maki scoffed, glaring daggers at Himiko for some kind of explanation.

Unfortunately, she wasn’t going to get one, the only response the mage gave to Maki was her light snoring.

“Gonta does not mind, Himiko is very light. Like holding a handful of grapes.” Gonta reassured. “Do you want Gonta to carry you too?”

“I’ll pass.” Maki sighed and shook her head.

“We’re almost there anyway,” Rantaro spoke, peering at the map in his hands.

“What are we even looking for?” she inquired. 

“A cave,” he answered, tucking the map away in his bag. “It’s rumoured to have plenty of treasure, but...”

“But?”

“Anyone who went looking for it made it up until this cave, after that, they weren’t seen again,” he explained. “So keep your guard up.” his eyes glanced over at Himiko, who was still sound asleep on Gonta’s back. “We should probably wake her up.” 

Rantaro made his way over and gently nudged Himiko, who grunted softly before she yawned and rubbed her eye.

“Five more minutes...” she requested through a second yawn.

“Himiko, we’re here,” Rantaro stated.

“Huh?” she paused and blinked. “Oh yeah... forgot about that.” she lazily stretched. 

Maki huffed and muttered a string of insults under her breath as she reached for her crossbow on her back. Like Maki, they all reached for their representative weapons of choice. Rantaro armed himself with a set of daggers, Himiko readied her staff and Gonta drew his sword out of its sheath. 

“Alright, stay close and keep an eye out for danger,” Rantaro spoke. “I have no idea what awaits us in that cave, but I doubt it’s good.”

“Stay close to Gonta! Gonta protect you all!” he ordered, gripping the hilt of his sword with both hands. 

It was then they all entered the cave, with only the blue light emitting from Himiko’s staff as their only light source. It was dark, even with the light, it couldn’t illuminate the whole cave brightly enough.

As they made their way deeper into the cave, they discovered abandoned bags and a few skulls and other bones of past failed adventures. Gonta gulped and carefully stepped over the pile of bones, careful not to disturb them.

“Ew, I think I stepped in something,” Himiko whined.

“Just scrape your shoes off when we’re done.” Maki huffed.

“I can’t, I’m stuck.” Himiko lowered her staff to shine some light on her foot, which was underneath some kind of fluffy looking white substance. “Gross, what is that?” she frowned and tried once again to pull her foot free, but to no avail. 

“I never saw anything like this before,” Rantaro commented and kneeled down to get a closer look. “But something about it seems familiar.” he glanced over at Gonta and Maki. “What do you two make of this?”

“Never seen any traps that looked like that, must be a new spell or substance,” she commented.

“Gonta thinks it looks like a spider web.”

“It kinda does, but I doubt this came from any normal spider,” Rantaro spoke. 

“But didn’t giant spiders go extinct?” Maki pointed out. “Even then their webs were never this strong.” 

“I don’t care about spiders, just get me unstuck!” Himiko huffed, trying to get free of the sticky substance.

“Gonta on it!” he wrapped his arms around Himiko and began to tug, it was more difficult than he originally thought, but with a final tug, he freed Himiko from the sticky mess. “There, Himiko free now!” he grinned and gently set her down.

“Thanks,” she said. “Maybe you should carry me until we’re out of the cave and back home-“

“No,” Maki answered flatly, glaring daggers at Himiko. “Gonta already carried you all the way here. You should have more than enough ‘mana’ to keep walking and casting spells.” 

“Maki is right, we all need to be ready for a fight,” Rantaro added.

Himiko just huffed and they returned to walking deeper into the depths of the dark cave. The cave was massive, high walls and seemingly endless, but there was a massive increase of the white substance, but this time not only was it in messy clumps on the floor, but much larger bits were strung about the walls of the cave.

It was definitely spider silk, without a doubt. But the last giant spider was slain so long ago and these webs definitely didn’t come from any ordinary spider. Not to mention the quantities of the web were much greater than anything a typical giant spider could make and stronger and stickier than normal.

Maki stopped dead in her tracks, looking to the right. “Did you guys see that?”

“See what?” Rantaro questioned.

They soon got their answer, there was a sudden movement from something moving too fast for them to get more than a shadowy glimpse of some giant figure as it dashed.

“It’s going in front of us!” Maki called.

An arrow from her crossbow flew through the air, but the creature was faster despite its size. The arrow’s sharp metal tip pierced the cave’s stone walls. Himiko cast a spell and shot a bolt of blue magical energy at the creature, but it only gave the same result.

“Where did it go?” Rantaro asked, dagger raised and ready to attack.

“Did monster just leave?” Gonta asked.

“Maybe it got tired and needed a nap?” Himiko suggested with a shrug. “I know I do to restore my mana.”

“You cast one spell!” Maki hissed venomously, going over to collect her arrow. 

“Stay on your guard, it could be hiding, waiting for another attack-“

“Oh, Gonta found it!” he announced, pointing up at the extremely tall ceiling of the cave. Although he had extremely good eyesight, even in this dimly lit cave and how far the creature was still made it difficult to see the monster before them.

“Where is it?” Rantaro asked before glancing at Himiko. “Can you make your staff shine any brighter?”

“Not without using all my mana.”

“I seriously doubt you had much, to begin with,” Maki muttered.

“No worries, monster is getting closer,” Gonta answered, watching the monster lower itself down from a thick rope like string of spider web.

They all stared wide-eyed at the creature. Like they all suspected deep down, it was definitely spider related, but it was far from the giant spiders that had gone extinct. The spider was much bigger than the typical giant spider that was typically five feet, this one was at least nine or at the very most ten. Secondly was the colouring, giant spiders typically shared colouring and special traits with their smaller and less frightening ancestors. Such as if you found a normal black widow spider (which was terrifying and deadly enough on its own) you could most certainly find one a hundred times bigger and even more of a threat. But this arachnid was something Gonta had never seen in all his years of being an entomologist, the spider was a vibrant milky pink. But the size and colouring alone weren’t just what may this unusual spider so shocking, dare to say that was the least shocking part.

Where a spider’s head would be was instead a human torso, from below the waist they had an arachnid body, but above the waist looked completely human with a few small differences. The creature’s upper half had pale skin and a mop of messy blonde hair, clad in a ripped up dirty pink shirt, then there was her face. The arachnid had two big blue eyes and six smaller ones for a total of eight eyes, and finally, a mouth with sharp fangs inside and chelicerae fang on each corner of their lips.

“W-what is that thing?!” Rantaro cried out, staring in horror as the creature finally lowered itself completely to the ground, breaking off the rope like string of web it was using.

Gonta stood in awe, never in all his years did he see such a creature. A hybrid of human and arachnid, that seemed impossible. But yet, here this mighty beast stood in front of his very eyes. His mouth hung open as his sword carelessly dropped to the ground. Without even thinking, he took a step forward.

“Gonta, what are you doing?!” Maki hissed at him.

But the warning fell on deaf ears, he was almost hypnotized by the creature.

“You...” Gonta spoke, looking straight into the spider’s many blue eyes. The creature flashed its fangs and lowered itself to Gonta’s height. “You...” he paused, taking a moment to take a deep breath. “You are the most amazing arachnid Gonta has ever seen!” 

“Ha! Damn fucking straight I am!” the monster boasted crudely.

“Did... did that thing just talk?” Rantaro blinked.

“You’re so big!” Gonta gushed, rushing to one of the spider’s many long pink legs. “Bigger than any arachnid in the history of arachnids!”

“So you got a giantess fetish I take it?” the monster laughed. “Well, I’m ten feet of giant sexy spider lady!” 

“And you can talk!” Gonta smiled from ear to ear, feeling like an excited puppy. Sure talking to insects wasn’t anything out of the ordinary for him, but his friends could hear this one so easily! “Ah, Gonta sorry about manners. Forgot to introduce himself, Gonta’s name is Gonta Gokuhara.” he offered his hand for the spider to shake. “And you are the most incredible spider Gonta had seen in his life!”

She gave him a cocky grin and shook his hand. “I’m the girl genius with a golden brain and eight legs, Miu!” she announced loudly. “Man, it’s about time someone recognizes my natural aura of sheer perfection!” Miu crackled and used one of her incredible long spider legs to gesture to Gonta. “Man, I fucking like this one. Real nice change of pace from the usual people who come into my cave.”

“Can someone please explain what’s going on here?” Maki asked, taking a step closer to Miu. “What exactly are you?”

“I’m a drop dead gorgeous spider girl! That’s what!” she answered.

“I think she means why you’re part spider and part human,” Rantaro added.

“Yes, please tell!” Gonta urged. “Gonta really want to know!”

Miu flashed her fangs in a toothy grin. “Someone as incredible as me isn’t just born normally like all you boring virgin ass losers!”

“So were you cursed?” Rantaro asked, glancing over at Himiko. “Ever heard of magic like that?”

Himiko shrugged. “No, I never heard of magic that strong before.“

“Ha, guess mages just keep getting weaker and weaker now!” Miu added. “But to answer your question, yes and no, My great, great, great, great, great grandfather was, by a powerful witch.”

“What does that have to do with you?” Maki asked. “Is your whole family tree just spider monsters?”

“Nah, but that would have been awesome! But the bitch cursed him so that his daughter would be born as a badass monster. But he only had boring old sons, as did his sons, and so on and so on. They thought the curse was a fluke or was lifted, but turns out it just passed from generation. Kinda like a gene or some sickness, they were carriers for.” she explained. “But years go by, generations come and go, and sure enough I’m born! Eight lovely shapely legs and eight big beautiful blue eyes and all! Man, I’ll tell you, the midwife nearly had a heart attack when I emerged from my mother’s snatch!” she howled in laughter. 

“I can imagine your parents did as well,” Rantaro added.

“Obviously!” she scoffed. “They probably forgot about the curse, but oh well.” she shrugged. “Not my fault they couldn’t see how badass and brilliant I am. They just abandoned me in this cave not even an hour after I was born.”

“That’s so cruel!” Gonta frowned sadly. “How could family do such a thing?”

“Whatever, it’s their loss!” Miu crossed her arms. “Guess they thought I would die from how cold it was. But that’s the good thing about being a spider, natural survival instincts. I could spin a web within a matter of seconds!” she bragged. “With my natural brilliance, survival instincts and stunning good looks, I became who I am today!”

“A giant spider who eats adventurers and spends all day in a cave,” Himiko muttered.

“Fir-first off, they attacked me first! It was self-defence!” Miu stuttered. “Secondly I-I don’t just stay inside a cave all the time! Sometimes I venture out for trinkets to invent stuff! It’s not easy being a giant spider lady!” she barked. “It’s hard getting around with people constantly casting spells and shooting arrows at you!”

“Fair enough...” Himiko muttered.

“Wait, did you say you invent things?” Rantaro asked.

“Duh! I’m an inventor after all!” she announced excitedly. “Wanna see my inventions?”

Miu didn’t give them a chance to answer, she already scurried off deeper into the cave before returning back in record time. 

“This invention will change the world!” Miu announced. “Now, as many of you know some people are born or develop poor eyesight, so I got just the thing for that!” she held up a thing of thin metal that was looped twice to hold two pieces of round glass. “Put these puppies on and bam! Nothing will be blurry ever again!”

“That’s so impressive!” Gonta gushed. “Miu so smart!”

“Aren’t those just glasses?” Himiko asked. “They have already been invented.”

“Huh? W-wh-What is you mean they already been invented!?” Miu stuttered, face pale.

“Himiko is right, glasses had already been invented,” Rantaro added. “Gonta is wearing a pair.”

“Are you kidding me!?” Miu gawked, all of her multiple eyes wide in horror. “I spent all that time collecting glass for nothing!?” she shifted awkwardly in her spot. “Well, I bet you don’t have a small curved metal device to help you eat liquid food.”

“That’s called a spoon.”

“What!? Okay, what about a blanket made from squares of fabric?”

“A quilt.” 

“For fuck’s sake!” Miu huffed and punch the walls of the cave in frustration.

“You had many adventurers come in your cave, did they not have anything similar on them?” Rantaro asked.

“I was too busy trying to defend myself to ask!” she hissed. “And it’s not easy to move around as a giant gorgeous spider lady without being seen!”

“Well... regardless it’s still impressive you came up with all these things with so little contact or knowledge outside this cave,” he reassured.

“Gonta still think Miu is smart!” Gonta added.

“I don’t...” Himiko sighed. “Can we go now?”

“Not yet, I need to know something.” Maki began and looked at Miu. “The whole reason we came here was because there was rumoured to be treasured lying here in this cave. Now is that true or not?”

“Treasure? You want to know about the treasure?” Miu asked, Maki, nodded. 

“That’s what we came here for.” 

“I’ll tell you about the treasure!” Miu grinned. “The real treasure is my sweet spider pussy!” she announced proudly.

“... Do you want to die?” Maki threaten.

Miu nervously leapt back. “I...I....” she stuttered.

“So all this was for nothing?” Himiko sighed.

“N-no it’s not, you got to meet me!” Miu argued. “The genius spider lady with the golden brain!”

“She does have a point,” Rantaro spoke. “I never saw a spell effect someone like this.”

“Rantaro and Miu right!” Gonta agreed. “Gonta never saw such an arachnid before! This is amazing! If a spell can make a human being born as part spider, can there be others? Maybe a mantis one? Or a ladybug? Maybe even an ant?” he listed on excitedly. “So many possibilities!”

“Hmp, I doubt it. Magic like that probably was forgotten a long time ago, or the few mages who could cast it died out.” Maki spoke. 

“Even if they could, you won’t find a better, smarter and more stunning monster gal like me!” Miu announced. 

Before any of them could get another word in, the sound of thunder from afar filled the cave.

“Sounds like a storm is brewing,” Rantaro commented and turned to Miu. “I know we didn’t meet on the best of terms, but if you could allow us to take shelter for until the storm passes, we would be very grateful.”

“You wanna speed a night with this eight-legged beauty? Ha! Get in line!” Miu snickered. 

“Whatever, I’m gonna take that as a yes,” Himiko said and immediately plopped down, digging out her pillow and blanket from her bag before quickly dozing off.

Without much else to say, everyone began to unpack and get comfortable, figuring a good rest was in order.

“Gonta didn’t realize it was so late already,” he stated, it seemed like it was only daylight hours ago.

“Yeah, tends to happen when you spend all day in a cave,” Miu answered and began to climb up the walls of the caves.

“What is Miu doing?”

“I’mma spin myself a badass web to sleep in, that’s what!” she said in a cocky manner. “I do this every night!”

“Spider webs are very pretty, mind if Gonta watch?”

“Of course you can! Who am I to deny the little people the right to bask in my glory?” Miu smirked.

Right away Miu went to work spinning a web, Gonta watched in awe. As an entomologist, he has seen many spiders spin webs but watching Miu do it was a completely different experience. The web was much thicker and easier to see, making it easier to witness Miu carefully weave her web. She was careful but quick, clearly having done this many times before. It was like watching an artist paint, which was no understatement in terms of comparison, an artist painting and Miu weaving her web both had the same end goal, create a masterpiece. And sure enough, once Miu was done, her web was nothing short of one. 

“Amazing, right?” Miu bragged. 

“Yes, web looks incredible!” Gonta praised. 

“Of course it does, it’s made by yours truly!” she grinned, getting settled in the middle of her creation. “You know what’s really amazing about my webs?”

“Is it the size or how thick it is?”

“Nope, it’s that no one ever taught me how. Soon as my parents left me in this cave, I just automatically knew how to and I wasn’t even a day old,” she explained gleefully. “I was a genius the moment I was born! Man, my parents were fucking idiots to leave me!” Miu lowered herself to the ground again with her thick string of web. 

“As a gentleman, Gonta don’t think it’s polite to talk ill of people. But Gonta agrees, no parent should abandon child just because they're different. Parents should be lucky they had you, Gonta actually went missing for years.” 

“Shit, really? Were you like, kidnapped or something?” 

“No, Gonta wandered off into the woods at a young age searching for bugs, was raised by Reptites. They taught Gonta how to talk to bugs and animals,” he explained. “Gonta eventually came back to civilization and became an entomologist.” 

“Damn, that’s pretty impressive. Not as impressive as yours truly, far from it actually. But still, impressive.” she said. 

“Thank you, though Gonta still has goal of becoming a gentleman.” 

“Gentleman?” Miu echoed back. “Why is that your goal now? You could be doing a thousand other things! Why waste your time doing that?”

“Parents said Gonta was too wild once he returned, blame reptites. So Gonta decided to try and become a gentleman to be accepted by human family and for them to accept forest family.” 

Miu blinked, staring at him with all of her eight eyes. “Wait... so you’re telling me that you disappeared into the wilderness as a snot-nosed brat, were missing for YEARS, only survived because of your little forest family, learned a fuck ton about entomology and your parents are being complete pricks about the whole thing?!”

“Uh... Gonta suppose so, but that’s why Gonta must become a gentleman!”

Miu scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Yeah, that’s a load of bullshit. Your folks should have just been grateful you were alive and well. It’s not like you were cursed like me!” 

“Gonta thought Miu liked being a spider monster?”

“Don’t get me wrong, I totally do.” she clarified. “I’m strong as fuck and I can spin these badass webs. But it’s annoying as hell to not be able to go anywhere. Soon as anyone sees me is always ‘kill that thing’ followed by a bunch of screaming and flaming arrows.” Miu explained. “Like how am I suppose to invent shit to help their lives if I don’t know what the fuck is going on?”

“Gonta sorry to hear that must be difficult.”

“Don’t apologize, you’re one of the first humans to ever talk to me and finally recognize my brilliance.” Miu smiled. “Kinda late though, but better late than never.”

Gonta let out a yawn. “Sorry to cut this short, but Gonta is sleepy, goodnight, Miu.”

“Yeah sure, we can continue to talk about shit tomorrow if you want,” Miu said as she got settled comfortably in her web for the night. 

Gonta got comfortable with his blanket and pillow and soon dozed off for the night.

....

Morning eventually came, Gonta was the first one up and the first thing he began to do was to sketch while eating his breakfast, which consisted of apple slices and a slice of cinnamon raisin bread. While he ate, Gonta also sketched and wrote in his notebook by some torches Himiko lit up throughout the cave with the help of Miu. The page he was working on consisted of little jot notes about the webbing Miu could make, as well what little she knew and told them about the spell the mage used to turn her into the arachnid she was today. And of course, the notes were accompanied by a sketch of none other but the spider lady herself. 

“Whatcha’ drawing?” Miu asked, lowering herself down on a string of her web.

“Gonta drawing you,” he held up his notebook to show her his notes and sketch. “Gonta never ever saw an arachnid-like you, want to make sure to never forget.”

“Seriously, I doubt you could ever forget someone as talented and drop dead gorgeous as me!” she scoffed, crossing her arms. “But its a good sketch, I’ll give it that. You seriously nailed my fangs.” Hmmm.... maybe I could invent another kind of art.” Miu mused as she rubbed her chin in thought. “Maybe instead of drawing normally, I created some kind of colourful substance you could smear with to create art? That’s perfect, it’s gonna be a perfect invention! It’s gonna be-“

“Paint.” The voice of Maki spoke, “Already been invented.”

“Oh god damn it!” Miu cursed. 

“Oh, Maki, Gonta didn’t realize you were up already.” 

“We’re getting our things together to leave now, Rantaro didn’t want to bother you two,” she informed. “The storm is over and we have just enough rations for the trip back.”

“Ah, Gonta better get to packing then!” he shut his notebook and returned it to his bag.

“Awww, you’re leaving already?” Miu pouted. “I mean, I don’t care about the other losers, but you’re okay.”

This statement was of course met by Maki giving Miu her signature and terrifying glare. 

“What's with that look?! I-I didn’t do anything wrong!” she stuttered, slowly backing her gigantic body away from Maki.

“Miu doesn’t need to worry, Maki does that all the time,” he reassured.

“Just get to packing, we wasted enough time on this expedition,” she said with a sigh and turned around to join the others.

Right away Gonta polished off his small breakfast and began to pack his things before slinging his bag over his shoulders, just as the others came with their own belongings packed. 

“Gonta, can you carry my bag?” Himiko asked. “I don’t have enough mana.”

“Well, you better find it.” Maki huffed.

“You good to go?” Rantaro asked Gonta nodded in response. “Alright then, let’s head out.” he turned to Miu. “Thank you for letting us stay the night.”

“It’s fine, I don’t get many visitors who actually try to talk to me. Probably too intimidated by my golden brain and drop dead gorgeous looks!” Miu grinned confidently. 

“Yeah, that’s probably why they also tried to kill you,” Himiko added. “Can we go now? This cave smells.”

“My cave isn’t smelly! I keep it clean!” Miu defended only to be ignored.

“Come on, the sooner we leave the better.” Maki urged and went on ahead to the cave’s entrance with the others and Gonta and Miu trailing behind.

“It was nice meeting you,” Gonta said as they walked. 

“You too, it’s about damn time someone recognizes my talent!” she boasted, hands confidently on her hips. “Shame you’re leaving, I would have loved for you to stick around and tell me how amazing my spidery form is.”

“Maybe Gonta could visit again?” he suggested. “Unfortunately Gonta doesn’t think it will be too often with the long trip here and back, but Gonta is willing.”

“Why don’t I just meet you half way?” she suggested. “Spiders are pretty damn fast after all.”

“But won’t Miu get attacked if seen?”

“I can just travel by night!”

“Gonta can’t wait! He still has so many questions about Miu’s form! If Miu doesn’t mind answering them.”

“I’m always down to talk about my three favourite things. Inventions, sex and of course my flawless ass self!” 

“It’s a date!”

Sure enough, they reached the cave’s entrance and were greeted by bright morning sunlight.

“Gonta supposes this is goodbye,” he spoke, turning to Miu. 

“Yeah, guess so.” she lazily stretched. “For now at least, I can’t wait for your next visit! I’m gonna invent a ton of awesome shit for you to try out!” 

“Assuming it hasn’t been invented already,” Himiko added.

“He-hey, not all of us are hu-human and can get around easily!” she stuttered.

“Maybe next time we meet, Gonta could teach Miu about stuff that already exists?”

All of her blue eyes lit up at the suggestion. “Hey, that could work! Shit, guess even normal humans have some brains after all. It’s gonna be like a brainstorming session together!” she chuckled before pouting. “Ugh, that just makes it more fucking depressing that you're leaving.” 

“Gonta knows and Gonta sorry...” he sighed then paused, eyes lighting up as he dug through his bag and got out his notebook. “Here,” Gonta opened up his note to the section where he had drawn Miu, and carefully ripped out the page. “Gonta knows how much you liked the drawing, so please keep it.”

“Holy shit, seriously?” Miu wasted no time swiping up the drawing and getting another look at it. 

“Gonta can always draw another one, and if we’re meeting again, Gonta can get even better notes too! There’s so much Gonta wants to know!”

“Heh, of course, I’m utterly amazing after all!” Miu beamed. “Damn, it feels so nice to finally be recognized for my work! I could kiss you!” 

“Okay!” Gonta agreed, causing Miu to stare at him.

“Rea-really?!”

“In the books Gonta read, gentleman always kissed a nice woman at the end of an adventure!”

“I don’t think Miu counts as a nice woman, but you do you.” Himiko shrugged. 

“Hmp, you’re just jealous Gonta gets first dibs on a total babe like me!” she hissed. 

“Just hurry up and get it over with, the sooner we start our trip home the better.” Maki shook her head.

“Alright, Gonta never did this before, but Gonta try his best!” he grinned.

“Ri-right, let’s kiss.” Miu shifted awkwardly before lowering herself down to his level. 

“Watch the fangs,” Maki warned.

Gonta read a lot of books about gentlemen, and a lot of them kissed women, so hopefully, he learned enough about how to do this properly. He took a deep breath and brought his lips to Miu’s. Her lips were surprisingly soft, just like the books said they would be. But they didn’t taste sweet as the books described, instead, they tasted rather bitter and almost chemical like. But it wasn’t repulsive or anything that would make him push her away. 

Soon they broke away from each other.

“Gonta feel dizzy.”

“Ha! probably because I’m such a good kisser!” 

Gonta wanted to nod but instead collapsed. Everything went blurry as he could hear the sound of his friends rushing to his aid.

“Wha-what happened!?” Himiko asked.

“Miu, are you venomous?” Maki questioned.

“Nope, I’m poisonous!.... oh. Whoops, my bad.”

“Really, you poisoned Gonta and all you can say is ‘whoops’?!” The voice of Himiko hissed.

“We need to give him the antidote in his bag!” Maki ordered.

Gonta couldn’t make out the rest of what everyone was saying, soon everything just faded to black.

....

Gonta awoke with a groan, his head throbbing as he slowly sat up. Once the dizziness wore off and his head didn’t feel like it was spinning, he was able to focus. 

“He’s up!” Rantaro called, rushing to his sides along with the rest of his group, while Miu lowered herself down from the ceiling with a thick string of web. 

“We almost lost you, no thanks to her.” Maki shot Miu once of her signature glares.

“I-I didn’t mean too!” Miu stuttered. 

“You just forgot you were a giant poisonous spider?” 

“It just slipped my mind!” 

“Enough, all your fighting is draining my mana.” Himiko interrupted.

“More importantly, how are you feeling Gonta?” Rantaro asked as he kneeled down next to him. “It took a lot of antidotes to take care of all that poison.” 

“Gonta fine now, but...”

“But?”

“Why did no one tell Gonta kissing was so amazing?!” he asked. “The books never said it was anything like that!”

“I don’t think the protagonists in your books were kissing curse poisonous spider women, Gonta,” Rantaro spoke. 

“You liked it!?” Miu asked before faking a cough. “I-I mean... of course you liked it! I am a genius at everything I do!”

“Gonta, you’re gonna get yourself killed.” Maki shook her head. “Stock up on antidote.”

“Dibs on all his stuff,” Himiko added.

Rantaro chuckled and got up. “Well, we're starting on preparing lunch for you. Rest up and take it easy, we're left once we eat.”

Rantaro, Maki and Himiko left, leaving just himself and Miu.

She nervously twirled a lock of her blond hair around her finger. “Hey...so sorry about the whole accidentally poisoning your thing. Kinda forgot about that part, caught up in the moment.” 

“Gonta forgives Miu, it was an accident after all.” he gave her a reassuring smile. 

“So... do you still wanna see me again?”

“Of course!”

She let out a sigh of relief. “Oh thank fuck, though I really blew my chance there for a moment.” 

“Lunch is ready!” called Rantaro from a distance.

“Coming!” he called back and got up.

“Hey, Gonta?”

“Yes?”

“For what it’s worth... you’re pretty fucking gentlemanly enough for me.”


End file.
